Teaching on seeing
If only we could see each other as we really are all the time.
Thomas Merton
Thomas Merton

Seeing Beyond the Veil: The Essence of True Perception

Thomas Merton's poignant observation, "If only we could see each other as we really are all the time," invites us to reflect on the profound layers of human existence. This statement speaks to the yearning for authenticity in our relationships, urging us to transcend the superficial masks we often wear. The stakes are high; in a world rife with misunderstanding and division, the ability to perceive one another's true essence could foster deeper connections and compassion. It is a call to awaken to the reality of our shared humanity, a reminder that beneath our differences lies a common thread of existence.

Delving deeper, Merton's words challenge us to consider the barriers that obscure our vision of one another. These barriers may be societal constructs, personal biases, or even the emotional armor we don to protect ourselves from vulnerability. The longing to see and be seen authentically is a universal desire, yet it remains elusive in our daily interactions. Merton's insight serves as both a critique of our current state of perception and an invitation to cultivate a more profound awareness of ourselves and others, encouraging us to engage with the world from a place of genuine understanding.

The image / the metaphor

The imagery in Merton's quote evokes a sense of longing and possibility. The phrase "see each other as we really are" suggests a vision that transcends the surface, inviting us to look beyond appearances and societal roles. The use of "if only" introduces a wistfulness, hinting at the difficulty of achieving such clarity in our perceptions. This longing for deeper connection resonates with the human experience, where we often find ourselves trapped in a web of misinterpretations and assumptions.

Metaphorically, Merton's words can be seen as a call to peel back the layers of illusion that cloud our vision. The act of seeing is not merely a physical process; it is an invitation to engage with the essence of another person. This deeper seeing requires vulnerability, openness, and a willingness to confront our own biases. It challenges us to embrace a more expansive view of reality, one that acknowledges the complexity of human existence and the interconnectedness of all beings.

In the speaker's tradition

Situated within the Trappist tradition, Merton's insight resonates with the concepts of kenosis and the search for true selfhood. Kenosis, or self-emptying, invites individuals to relinquish their ego-driven desires and embrace a more profound connection with the divine and with others. This aligns with Merton's call to see beyond the superficial, as true perception requires a letting go of the self that clings to judgment and separation. In this way, Merton's teaching echoes the Buddhist concept of sunyata, or emptiness, which encourages a recognition of the interdependent nature of existence.

In his work "Conjectures of a Guilty Bystander," Merton reflects on the complexities of human relationships and the barriers to genuine understanding. He writes about the importance of contemplative awareness, suggesting that through practices such as meditation and prayer, we can cultivate the clarity needed to perceive others authentically. This contemplative approach aligns with the Trappist commitment to silence and reflection, emphasizing the necessity of inner stillness to foster true connection with the world around us.

Living the teaching

Consider a modern scenario where Merton's teaching could profoundly impact our interactions: a workplace filled with diverse personalities and perspectives. In such an environment, misunderstandings can easily arise, leading to conflict and division. By consciously striving to see our colleagues as they truly are—beyond their roles and responsibilities—we can foster a culture of empathy and collaboration. This practice of deep seeing encourages us to engage with one another's stories, recognizing the shared struggles and aspirations that unite us.

Another application of this teaching can be found in our personal relationships, particularly during moments of tension or disagreement. When faced with conflict, we often become entrenched in our viewpoints, losing sight of the other person's humanity. By embracing Merton's call to see each other authentically, we can approach these moments with curiosity rather than defensiveness. This shift in perspective allows us to listen deeply and respond with compassion, ultimately transforming our relationships into spaces of growth and understanding.

A reflection

As we contemplate Merton's profound insight, we are invited to engage with a contemplative question: What prevents me from seeing others as they truly are? This inquiry encourages us to reflect on our own biases, fears, and assumptions that may cloud our vision. By exploring this question, we can begin to dismantle the barriers that separate us from one another, fostering a deeper connection to the shared humanity that binds us all. In this journey of seeing and being seen, we may discover not only the beauty of others but also the richness of our own inner landscape.

Thomas Merton
AuthorThomas Merton

Trappist monk, writer, and mystic. His autobiography The Seven Storey Mountain sparked renewed interest in contemplative Christianity.

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Going deeper

Merton's quote emphasizes the importance of perceiving others beyond superficial appearances and societal roles. He suggests that true understanding requires vulnerability and a willingness to confront our biases, allowing us to connect with the essence of another person.
You can apply Merton's teaching by consciously practicing empathy and active listening in your interactions. Make an effort to engage with others' stories and experiences, recognizing the shared humanity that exists beneath differences.
Yes, the theme of authentic seeing and understanding is prevalent in Trappist writings. Authors like Henri Nouwen and Thomas Keating also explore the importance of contemplative awareness in fostering genuine connections with others.
Kenosis refers to the self-emptying necessary for true connection, while sunyata emphasizes the emptiness of inherent selfhood. Both concepts encourage letting go of ego-driven perceptions to foster deeper understanding and interconnectedness.
Meditation and contemplative prayer are practices that support the cultivation of deeper awareness and empathy. These practices help quiet the mind, allowing for greater clarity in perceiving others authentically.

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